Morning. Just having my usual early decaf. The wife likes sleeping with the windows open to keep it cool. I was woken by the birds at 4:30 so I decamped into a spare bedroom.
Reading one of my favourite other blogs and their amazing amount of days sober it reminded me of my day yesterday. A day that every sober person knows and has when they live with a person who drinks (I think they do? Mmmm.
I was at a restaurant after shopping and enjoying conversation with my other half as she drank a large 250ml glass of white 13.5%. The conversation went from easy to slightly more difficult by the time that alcohol hit her brain. The intoxication upsets the tone and content of conversation. Basically it ever-so slightly stipifys the person. It’s like talking to an emotional perulant child. Slightly more emotional, a little more detached, easier to upset, child like. As a non drinker I am now on my guard, on edge and a little irritated that I now have to change my whole conversation, my tone and guard against emotional attacks when eating 🍕!
The sad 😢 part is the person has no idea. When we returned from shopping I decided to take the dogs for a walk and she suggested going via the pub. I just dreaded it, not that I don’t like pubs but listening to a loud boring emotional conversation, knowing that there would be the usual attacks or slights. Knowing that sober we would get along great. You know the usual ones you get when someone drinks and can get “bitter”. Luckly she decided not to, as we walked passed. I had the joy of waiting until we were home for more of it, white wine. She rang her mum, that ended in an argument, both talking over each other both trying to be right. She finished the call and looked at me and said “jeez what is my mother like eh”. I obviously didn’t say she was as bad. Also I have to answer her very quickly if she asks me a question or she gets irritated and says “doesnt matter” before I can answer. She will ask a question or say something when I have my earphones in or concentrating on a book and then get annoyed if I say sorry say that again. For which she will refuse to repeat and act like a wounded child.
She had her hair cut yesterday morning. Before she asked me if she should go long or short. I said short which ended in a “why? Don’t you like it longer? I knew that was a trick question that either answer was dangerous. The whole day was pretty much taken up discussing her hair cut or admonishing (semi-jokingly) anybody who hadn’t noticed, until she had forced a compliment that pleased her.
Luckily I am in the garden, with my coffee, bird song and peace. This should last until about 9:30 😂😂.
Is this what other sober people experience too? Would love to know? Xx